Jokes for July 2nd

Thanks for joining me ton this Wednesday evening. I hope everyone is ready for a laugh or two. These jokes and riddles might not be good, but I hope you can at least get a chuckle or two.

How do you make an ice cream float?

Put it on the Queen Mary

What does a cat call anchovies in ice cream?

Purr-fection.

It’s a little known fact that Abe Lincoln once considered a career in construction, in fact he once was contracted to build a house. To save time, Abe Lincoln built the house in two pieces, he planned on connecting the two pieces before the roof was finished, however the house collapsed, proving once and for all that a house divided against itself cannot stand.

Did you hear about the farmer who suddenly changed careers? He became a bean counter.

What do you get if you cross a nonprofit and a citrus tree?

Lemon aid.

Finish the joke

Last weeks joke:

What do you get if you put a cow and a block of ice in a life boat?

No one came up with an ending to that joke and to be honest with you, I couldn’t either. Let’s try something easier this week:

What does a cat do if he finds himself in a seafood restaurant?

I’m sorry there weren’t more jokes this week, I’ll try to have more next week.
Thanks for reading, I hope you got a chuckle tonight.

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