Jokes for July 16th

Once more it’s Wednesday night and I’ve got a few jokes for you.
This week I’ve decided to present to you a collection of my favorite jokes from previous Wednesdays.
i hope you get another chuckle from these jokes.

Why did the author go digging in his garden?
He was looking for bookworms!

Long ago there was a cowboy called Slim, in addition to riding herd, he worked at maintaining the telegraph line as an electrician . Eventually Slim retired and went east to visit his cousin in New York.
Slim was warmly received until his cousin asked him why he left the west and Slim replied ” I’m delightfully deranged.”

A paranoid rich man died, with his dying breath he revealed that only a laughing ghost talker could manage to tell his heirs where his will was. After several months of searching, the courts reluctantly admitted that they couldn’t find a happy medium.

What did people call the wannabe actor who was fired from a peach preserve factory?
A canned ham!

What happened when the salad saw the peanut dressing?
It was shell shocked!

Three nuts run into a bar in Nevada, they were arrested on suspicion of running a shell game.

A man walked into a truck stop and ordered a hamburger, ad an after thought he added “Hold the pickle.”
A few moments later, Harry, the truck stop’s harried short order chef whose was very hairy, came marching out on the kitchen and thrust a dripping cucumber into the man’s hand, saying “Hold your own pickle!”

Jack went to a taco joint south of the border for lunch, after he had eaten he noticed a rabbi, a cardinal and a cleric making something together behind the counter, curious he asked the proprietor, Jose.
Jose opened his mouth to reply, but a ninja fell from the ceiling, pressed a dirk to Jose’s throat and asked what he wanted on his tombstone.
Being a person who always answered any questions asked him, and knowing that he had only one more chance to speak before he died, answered both questions at one by saying “Holy guacamole!”
Jose was astounded when the ninja laughed, handed him an avocado pizza and left peacefully.

New joke

I wouldn’t feel right without offering one new joke, no matter how bad it is, so here you go:

Joe was excited when he went to the airport, he thought TSA stood for Taco Society of America. When told he was wrong, he asked why all airports have a society insides them devoted to antique cars.

I hope you enjoyed these jokes, next week I’ll try to have all news jokes. sorry for any typos.
Thanks for reading!

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