How to ruin any food: Ice Cream Cones

Tonight we’re looking at ice Cream Cones and how to ruin them. This is strictly ice cream cones tonight, not floats or sundaes… we did those in previous posts.

Before we begin, I want to offer these normal words of warning:

 

WARNING: DO NOW READ ANY FURTHER IF YOU ENJOY FOOD!

The rest of this post is designed to be humorous and is not intended to be taken seriously. Any attempt to ingest the substance described in the following paragraphs is not suggested and should be avoided. You’ve been warned.

 

History of tonight’s food:

 

The origins of ice cream cones are almost as confusing as most of the foods I’ve looked at over the past few months, of course.

Depending on the source, you can find claims about cones being used for ice cream as far back as the 1770s… though I really doubt George Washington had an ice cream cone before each battle.

In the U.S. we can credit the 1904 world fair in St. Louis for introducing us to the ice cream cone, though the story of how it was invented at the worlds fair can vary a bit from source to source. Suffice to say a waffle was rolled into a cone and paired with a scoop of ice cream, an act that spawned a new delicacy.

 

The most complete site I’ve found regarding the history of ice cream cones is:

http://whatscookingamerica.net/History/IceCream/IceCreamCone.htm

Another interesting site is: http://www.ideafinder.com/history/inventions/icecreamcone.htm

 

What it is:

 

An ice cream cone is simply a pastry in a cone shape, be it a traditional waffle cone or any other kind of cone you can think of.

 

Ways to ruin it:

 

At first glance you might think that it would be hard to ruin an ice cream cone, but with just a bit of ingenuity it’s not hard at all.

Here are a few funny ways to begin:

 

Put the ice cream under the cone.

Hold the cone on your nose while you get a scoop of ice cream.

Toss the cone to someone else just after you drizzle chocolate syrup on top.

 

Now let’s get serious and really start ruining ice cream cones!

 

    Full replacements:

 

Replace  the cone with a paper mache cone, it’s a good source of fiber.

 

Use a taco shell instead.

 

Take your favorite pasta, cook it and form the limp noodles into a cone shape, let it dry and serve with a scoop of tomato ice cream in it.

 

Deep fry a tortilla and fill it with jalapeno ice cream or sour cream, place pickled jalapenos on top.

 


Toppings:

 

Hot sauce

Mustard

Ketchup

Sweet and sour sauce.

Jalapeno fudge.

 

That’s about all the ideas I have tonight on how to ruin an ice cream cone, however I have two cones that any cat will enjoy:

 

Vanilla ice cream, sprinkle with catnip and place an anchovy under the ice cream. Any cat would love this cone.

 

Another cone for a cat would be to make the cone with catnip added, catnip ice cream and top with a sprinkle of catnip. Serve cold and watch out, your cat will be ready to think a speck of lint is an army of mice for it to defeat.

 

I hope you’ve enjoyed this post, I enjoyed writing it. I hope that you won’t try any of these, though I think all the flavors I have listed could be created with a little work.

I hope you’ll join me again next week, when another unsuspecting food will face ruination.

Thanks for reading and feel free to comment.

 

 

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