Jokes for August 20th

Tonight I’ve got several new jokes for you. They aren’t good jokes, but I think you might get a few laughs out of them. I hope you enjoy.


What’s the difference between a weather forecaster and a politician?

One talks about hot breezes, the other talks hot air.

What does a slow race car and a politician have in common?

They both go a mile a minute.

What do you can a fish that lives in the desert?


What sport is played in the kitchen?



Why did the parrot quote Shakespear?

The real question is if the parrot was a bee or not a be.

Why did the baseball club fill it’s stands with blowers?

They needed more fans.

Why did the bookshelf keep losing it’s books?

The cat scared the Dickens out of it.


A gypsy, a beggar and a cleric walked past a bar.
“What a gip, they don’t serve werewolves,” the gypsy said in disgust as he glanced at a sign in the bar window.
“I beg to differ,” the beggar began but the cleric interrupted shouting “Holy flying androids!” as he ducked a smartphone.

That’s it for tonight. I hope at least one of these got you to chuckle.
Do you think these jokes stink? Are these gut busters? Let me know what you think! I’m always interested.
Thanks for reading!

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