Jokes for November 19th

It’s Wednesday night again, time for another batch of jokes! Tonight I’ve got a bunch of jokes, both good and bad, that I’m eager to share with you!

Whats

What did the submarine captain do when he retired?
He bought a dive.

What did Dr. Van Helsing serve for Thanksgiving?
Stakes.

What did the baseball pitcher turned judge say to the outfielder before throwing the book at him?
You’re way off base.

Jokes

A world famous cyber thief took sick and when to see a famous doctor. The doctor examined the thief. After careful consideration, the doctor said “Take one tablet an hour and call me in the morning.”

The captain of a submarine retired and opened up a hardware store that only took orders online. Things were going well until one day when a retired enemy admiral turned contractor came in to pick up his order. The retired sub captain asked for his order, the admiral replied “Sink, sink!”

Cats

Jane excitedly called up a famous scientistic paper to announce a world shaking discovery.
“I’ve discovered something that can change its mass to be as light a a feather or as heavy as a boulder!”
The scientists were appropriately intrigued and asked for more details.
“It’s a cat,” Jane replied.

What activity are cats adept at?
Laps.

Thank’s for reading, I hope you enjoyed these jokes tonight.

Advertisements

Do you have anything to say?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s