Jokes for December 24th

It’s December 24th, it’s Wednesday as well, which means it’s joke night night. Consider these jokes a gift from St. Nicholas, though I doubt he’d bring jokes this bad.


What did the crime boss tell his gang when the police were about to round them up on Christmas Eve?
Dash away, dash away, now dash away all!

What animal loves rain in the winter?

What two elves always have their Christmas decorations stolen?
Holly and Jolly.

What does Santa Claus call the day before Christmas Eve?
The end of vacation.

What does Santa Claus call the day after Christmas?
Start of vacation!

What carol do reindeer sing?
Let it rain.


Why do boxers love christmas?
They love decking.

Why do carpenters always have the best decorated houses?
They are pros when it comes to decking.

Why should you never ask an actor to decorate your house?
They always take all the boughs.

Why are snowmen the worst polluters?
They have eyes of coal.


Long ago, a family named Hall went west to seek their fortune gold mining.
Everything went smoothly for them until December when they got into a gun fight with some claim jumpers. The claim jumpers were horrible shots and didn’t manage to hit any of the Halls before they ran out of ammo. The Halls weren’t any better shots, soon they were forced to duke it out. The claim jumpers won as they Decked the Halls.

Sorry these jokes were a bit late tonight.
Thanks for reading, I hope you’ve gotten a chuckle or two from these jokes!


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