Friday facts I just made up

Here are a few facts for you tonight, all unbelievable and rightly so, as I’ve just made them up. Enjoy!

It is a scientific fact that weekends go by faster minute by minute than other days of the week. This fact was first established by Einstein in his theory of relativity, using the equation WE=WD2.


 Gravity is a law that was almost repealed, but no politicians have ever managed to get 51% of congress to agree what should replace the law of gravity.

 A new effort is underway, it is being hid inside the next budget.


New research shows that outer space doesn’t not exist, it is really just an optical illusion caused by a few astronomers blinking really fast as they stare into the sun.


Earthquakes have been proven to be nothing more than the Earth burping after it has devoured an asteroid.


 A new effort is underway to tax all blogs unless the blog posts political topics slanted to favor whichever party is in power.


An Internet sales tax is being proposed set at 200% compounded annually for anything purchased online at any site other than a few sites approved by a congressional committee, bribes accepted.


The world is not going to be destroyed by an asteroid hitting in September this year, it was completely destroyed two weeks ago when Todd Swingwhipburgernoss in Detroit forgot to turn off the super laser in his basement. Everything you think you’ve thought in the past two weeks is false.


Despite rumors to the contrary, no one else s working on a flying car, instead they are working on a self driving flying car that will be more like a taxis owned and run by the car companies in an effort to make more money.


This is the end of this post. Oddly enough this fact is true.

 I hope you’ve enjoyed these fun facts tonight. 

Thanks for reading!

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