Jokes for October 21st

Tonight I have a few new jokes and a few jokes from last year. I always like to look back at my old jokes, sometimes I get ideas for new ones, other times I just get a laugh and decide to share them again.

 I have something new for you at the bottom of this post, take a look and let me know what you think.

 While these jokes might not make everyone laugh, I hope you’ll get a chuckle out of them at least, enjoy!

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Oldies

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A witch happened upon a vampire and a werewolf who were having a heated debate. When she asked what they were arguing about, the vampire and werewolf replied “Pumpkin guts!”

Once there was a young jack o lantern who was unable to compete at sports, after weeks of careful consideration his doctor reach a conclusion, he had no pumpkin guts.

The werewolf family always made sure to invite a witch along when they took a long trip, whenever they got lost they could just ask “Witch way?”

Did you hear that Dracula hired a werewolf to run a steamroller over his patch of turnips?
He had to, he couldn’t squeeze blood from a turnip himself.

Shortly before dawn one day, a vampire was hurriedly flying back to his coffin in bat form when he ran into a witch, literally. The witch lost her broom in the crash, the vampire was disorientated. The vampire, in desperation, grabbed the witch and asked “Witch, which way’s up?

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New jokes

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Why do vampires never bet on horse races?
They don’t like stakes.

Do werewolves enjoy gardening?
No, gardening is a wolfs bane.

When a religious personage presided over an annual contest to see who could throw a gourd the furthest, the pumpkin was canonized.

Who do monsters turn to for directions?
Witches, they always know which way to go.

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Halloween tounge twister!

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The monster mobsters marched on Mars in March.

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That’s it for tonight, I hope you enjoyed these jokes and my new tounge twister feature. Let me know what you think in the comments.

Thanks for reading.

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