What if… September 9th

Tonight I’m sharing a few what ifs with you. These are intended to give you a chuckle and just maybe a bit of food for thought.

What if…

Summer lasted all year round?

Moving boxes were just boxers who moved around the ring?

This post made sense?

Keyboards always worked right and didn’t skip letters on occasion?

Blog posts were easy to write?

We went back to where clouds that only contained rain or snow?

Humans used common sense more often?

New was actual news and not just rehashed leftover stories from a week ago?

Directions made sense?

I had consistently good ideas for my blog?

Thanks for reading.

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What if… June 17th edition

Tonight I pose the question, what if… these famous people were famous for something else. I’ll give you the famous person and ask what if they became famous for something else.
Ready? Let’s go!

What if…

Napoleon was famous for being a chess player?

William Shakespeare had been a musician who created punk rock?

Sir Isaac Newton had been a cookie chef?

Albert Einstein had written fairy tales?

The Wright brothers had focused on building submarines?

Theodore Roosevelt had become famous for inventing the radio?

Tomas Edison had become a war hero?

Paul revere had been an alchemist?

I hope you found this interesting and eye opening, feel free to comment, I’d love to hear your examples.
Thanks for reading!

What if… May 19th

What if…

Keyboards were made out of real boards?

Chocolate was outlawed?

Mouse pads were homes for mice?

Computer mice were called elephants?

My blog posts made sense?

A hot sauce was made so hot it melted the bottle?

Fingerprints were bright orange?

Potato chips were made out of anchovies?

My humor was normal?

Ice cream was always served boiling?

Bread knives were made out of bread?

I knew the secret to blogging?

That’s all I have for tonight, I hope you get a chuckle or two out of these!

What if… May 16th thoughts

What if…

The Hubble telescope was a bubble?

Newspapers published news instead of fluff?

Golf tees wore T-shirts?

Old black and white movies were actually just shades of grey?

Toothbrushes were made of teeth?

Keyboards were made from keys and boards?

Potatoes were shaped like either pots or toes?

Clocks had wings and could fly?

My blog was actually funny?

Thanks for reading!

What if… Part two

What if…

TV had decent shows?

Reality shows were based on ordinary people in real life?

TV news was more than fluff?

Meteorologists could predict the weather?

Entertainment was more… Entertaining?

Politics suddenly vanished?

Money was actually worth something?

It was discovered that the Stock market was misspelled and was supposed to be the Sock market?

I had something interesting to blog about?

Thanks for reading!

What if…

Tonight I pose several questions that begin “What if…”

What if…

The NSA spied on itself?

Broccoli tasted like chocolate?

The Rockies had a good bullpen?

People thought before they spoke?

A book read backward was called a koob?

Chocolate bars replaced normal bars?

Jails held real crooks… like politicians.

People could levitate while eating candy?

Thanks for reading, I hope you got a chuckle with these what ifs.
Feel free to comment.

How to survive a Time Travel accident, part four

This is the last of our lesions in surviving a time travel accident, at least until I have other things to say on the subject.

Tonight we will cover the last two options you might be faced with as, as well as do a quick review of the previous parts.

 

If you find yourself stuck in a future where human kind hasn’t encountered massive setbacks, wars or alien invasion, you have one possible option that most people wouldn’t think of exploiting, namely archeology.

Now before you dismiss this idea out of hand, please remember that you’ve got a head start on all other fakers, you’ve lived in this time and as such you can tell the future humans that a PDA wasn’t an early attempt as vaporizing people. You can also explain that the thousands of small rectangular pieces of plastic with magnetic strips on the back were used for transferring money, not as toothpicks. Small things like these might not be evident to future humans, as they undoubtedly will have DNA scanners that subtract the correct amount of Dracnors from their blood stream to pay for their purchases. and such old-fashioned ideas as having plastic cards linked to bank accounts will be all but unimaginable to them.

This is the best case situation for getting stuck in the future… if you do get stuck in the future don’t hesitate in trying to use future technology to return home, after all, if you manage to travel into the future, future humans will undoubtedly have already invented the same device.

 

Now for the best case situation after being trapped in the past:

 

Depending on when you get trapped in the past, consider going into politics, you’ll be coming at it from a unique angle; you’ll already know what will work and what won’t.

When going into politics in the past, feel free to use a fake name. A simple reason for this is that Greg Jones isn’t going to gain as much popularity as Tomas Jefferson. You must realize that you may all ready be a famous person in the past, you just need to get there in order to find out.

In such a case we’re forced to wonder if time travel has been rigged, after all, the world can be changed by a single person not being where he or she is supposed to be at a certain time, keep this in mind before and during your adventures in time.

 

To review:

Part one focused on what to do during the minutes first following being stranded in the past,  both during times of war and times of peace. It included tips for convincing the leader of an army to take you as an adviser in the midst of battle. During peace time I offered the pros of becoming an artist.

 

Part two focused on other ways to make a living by inventing items before their time, I also cautioned you about not inventing something too far in advance of it being useful.

Also included in this part was the suggestion that rescuing a doomed person of importance might be useful as well.

 

Part three dealt with certain situations that you might find yourself in in the future.

Also in part three I discussed how human kind might have changed, how it might have been involved in large wars or invaded by aliens.

I offered suggesting options ranging from becoming a blacksmith to taking over leadership of human enclaves. Also covered was the idea of becoming a hermit.

 

Part four is this part, which wraps everything up… if you need more details please feel free to comment below.

 

Thanks for reading, I hope that you’ve found the past few Saturday nights filled with interesting ideas and helpful suggestions regarding being stranded in time.

Please feel free to comment below.

Random thought for March 18th

Everyone has heard the old saying about March, in like a lion, out like a lamb.
Now I always assumed that that refer to weather, but what if it doesn’t? Just follow my thoughts for a moment.
March is also home to ‘March Madness’. I’m no basketball fan, but it does have something to do with my theory.
Now that we’ve got those two items firmly in mind, let’s continue and see where we get to.
Most sport teams are named after weather, weapons or animals… We’re getting something here, aren’t we?
What if the whole saying was originally part of a prophecy by Nostradamus as he forecasted a bracket centuries ago?
That would mean that the Lions would be the early favorites, but that a team called the Lambs would be a Cinderella and win everything.

While it’s doubtful that this is the real story behind the saying, it makes a fun post!
Thanks for reading!

How to survive a time travel accident, part 3

Tonight we come to the third part of our advice on how to survive a time travel accident; while our first two parts focused on how to survive a time travel accident that strands you in the past, tonight I will try to give you advice on surviving being stranded in the future.

Many of you are no doubt wondering why you would have any trouble surviving in the future, distant or near. As a quick answer I advise you to read or watch The Time Machine, that should answer your questions. However there are other reasons that you might have trouble, reasons I shall outline for you here:

 

  1. An EMP decimated all electronics and plunged humanity into chaos.
  2. An alien invasion has wiped out most humans and made any survivors leery of strangers.
  3. A plague wiped out all of humanity and another race is now ruling earth.
  4. A massive war, say WWIII, has raged so long that humans are reduced to swinging swords at one another as all other technology has been lost.
  5. Massive changes to both Earth and human society have created small enclaves of tightly controlled humans that cannot accept a stranger into their world.
  6. Humans have evolved into non corporeal beings that you cannot communicate with.

 

While there are doubtlessly other situations that you might encounter, these are enough to tackle for tonight.

We’ll focus on the EMP option first. EMP stands for Electromagnetic pulse, you can read more about them on Wikipedia:  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electromagnetic_pulse

An EMP could happen several ways, a high altitude nuclear explosion, a specially designed weapon or simply a solar flare are the two most people well versed on the subject fear. Basically what happens is that all electronics in the affected area are destroyed… you can just imagine the chaos that would follow such an event, especially if it’s a global event, all refrigeration would cease, everyone would lose all their money as banks would be destroyed in seconds, ect.

If you find yourself in such a world, the best you can hope for is an old west experience, a civilization trying to grow back too where it once was, law trying to restore itself and outlaws who think killing is fun and their right.

In such a world you must make yourself so valuable to both the lawless and the law itself that they cannot live without you, you might consider become a blacksmith or a gunsmith. No matter what you choose, you’ll be faced with a hard life.

 

In the case of an alien invasion, your best bet is to head for the hills and become a hermit or trapper, live off the land and interact with people as seldom as possible, it won’t be a comfortable life, but you’ll have a good chance to survive… unless the aliens have left behind animals from their own world that kill you first.

Should you instead try to help the humans that are left, you should be prepared to die, as it’s doubtful that you’ll succeed.

 

If you arrive in a world that has been decimated by an advanced plague, it’s doubtful that you’ll survive long enough to do anything, I’m sorry to tell you this, but it’s true.

 

If on the other hand you’re in a world reduced to medieval weapons, refer to the first part of this series as thing will be close enough not to make much difference, you should manage to live out a nice life, one filled with excitement and action if nothing else.

 

If you find yourself in a world of tightly knitted enclaves of humans that won’t accept a stranger in their midst, you do have a few options:

  1. Become a hermit, a simple option that is by far the least involved and safest.
  2. Keep watch over the enclave for a time, with luck you’ll find something attacking it, say a bear, if you drive the bear off or kill it, you’ll have a slight chance to be accepted in the enclave.
  3. search out another enclave, there are bound to be multiple enclaves, plus every now and then an enclave is bound to split in two, at which time you can try to gain access to one.
  4. Determine the leave of weapon technology the enclave has, then build something stronger, challenge the leader to a duel and take over the enclave. Note, this has the greatest risk of death and the shortest time of survival.

 

If you find yourself alone in the future as the populace has become non corporeal beings, I have nothing to offer you. The future non corporeal humans may look out for you, they may try to help you evolve yourself, or they may kill you with a thought, I don’t know enough to offer any advice in such a situation, only that once again, becoming a hermit might save your life.

 

I hope that this has given you a few things to think about. Please feel free to comment and thanks for reading!