Headlines we didn’t see this week

I thought I’d try something new tonight, let me know what you think.

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News can be odd sometimes, unfortunately we didn’t see these headlines:
‘Is it a cloud or a pineapple?’

 

‘Pineapple express crosses USA, pina coladas for everyone.’

 

‘Russian hack of the DNC shown to have compromised classified chocolate chip cookie recipe.’

 

‘FBI confirms Russia hacks influenced the outcome of several reality television shows.’

 

‘Twenty billion dollar study confirms trees are indeed plants.’

 

‘Six year, $1.8 trillion study finds weekends are the end of the week.’

Thursday night humor for January 12th

Another week, another joke.

 Before the humor, I have a quick question for you: which title do you prefer for this weekly post ‘Humor for date’ or ‘Jokes for date’? Let me know in the comments.

 

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Why did the snowman hate the cold snap?

His New Years resolution was to lose weight.

 

How does a cat spend a cloudy day?

He sleeps any way he wants.

 

What did the cat think when the mouse got the milk product in the cartoon?

She declared that it was a cheesy scene.

 

When a mouse stole the spotlight at an awards ceremony, the cat said that the mouse was acting cheesy.

 

If a snowman snubs a celebrity, I guess you could say he gave the star a cold shoulder.

 

What do you call an athlete who pawns pass cards?

A hock-key player

  

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I hope you enjoyed the humor for tonight. Thanks for reading!

A cats thoughts for January 11th

Once again I’m bringing you a cat’s thoughts, tonight it will be on a few of the news stories, mostly from the past week, enjoy.

 

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In response to the allegations of Russian hacking:

 “Hacking isn’t fun, it’s even worse if there isn’t a shoe to hack into… or a blanket.”

 

In response to my question regarding the Donald Trump’s Cabinet picks:

“Cabinets are good to knock things off of, as are shelves and dressers. However you do have to pick the items well, glass ones make beautiful noise when they fall, but treats taste good.”

 

About the uproar around the Golden Globe awards:

“Humans do seem to like gold, I do too, but only in string, globes are too hard to dig your claws into.”

 

About the weather:

“Cold weather is good for laps or nice thick blankets, either one may do.”

 

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I hope you enjoyed these words of cat insight. Thanks for reading!

Thursday night jokes for January 5th

New year, new night, new jokes! Enjoy!

 

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Why can’t snowmen be politicians?

Because they aren’t full of hot air.

 

Why is a retired pirate like a stale pretzel?

They are both old salts.

 

Did you hear about the dentist who repaired teeth with candy? He gave everyone a sweet tooth.

 

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I didn’t promise that they’d be good jokes. I hope you enjoyed these jokes anyway. Thanks for reading!

A cat’s thoughts for January 4th

I know you might have been expecting some jokes tonight, but since I’ve been runnng a day late with jokes recently, I’ve decided to change my joke night to Thursday. So tonight I have a few thoughts from a cat for you to enjoy.

 

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“Even though Christmas had come and gone, I’m still hard at work making sure no creature is stirring… unless it’s supposed to be or I’m asleep.”

 

“I was going to start a mouse ranch, but then I discovered that no one, besides cats, wants them.”

 

 “Even us cats are sick and tired of hearing about politics.”

 

“I have a sure fire way to get rid of the mice, but I need some TNT… oddly enough no one understands me when I ask for it.”

 

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I hope you enjoyed this look into the thoughts of a day. Let me know if you want to see more posts like this. Also feel free to ask questions for a cat in the comments.

Thanks for reading!

Happy new year 2017!

Happy new year. I hope everyone had a nice holiday season. Now it’s time to get back to normal.

 Last year wasn’t a very good year for my blog, it was an odd year, let’s leave it at that. However I’m going to do my best to have fun new posts for you to enjoy this year.

 Thank you for following my blog.

R.I.P Debbie Reynolds 

The great actress Debbie Reynolds has died, she was one of the last great actresses from the golden age of movies.

 She will always be remembered for such great movies as Singing in the Rain, Bundle of Joy and many others. 

She had a long career with many movies, both well received and not very memorable movies.

Good bye, Debbie Reynolds, you will be missed, but you’ll never be forgotten.

Jokes for December 22nd

I’m late with my jokes again this week, sorry. I hope you enjoy these classic jokes:

 

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What happened when the gift was stolen by a cat?

It was catnapped.

 

Why wasn’t the snowman worried about the snow shovel?

He had ice in his veins.

 

Was the snowman afraid of the snow shovel?

He was frozen stiff.

 

Why is a melting snowball like a spy?

They both came in from the cold.

 

Why did the snowball become a rouge spy?

Because is was out in the cold.

 

A priest, a snowman and a farmer walk into a police station in Hawaii to report a crime. The farmer and priest enjoy the warmth, while the snowman says “I feel like I’m being grilled.”

 

What was the complaint of the puma on a beach?

Sandy claws.

 

What did people call the murderer snowman?

A cold blooded killer.

 

Why are political parties like snowstorms?

Because they are both filled with flakes.

  

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I hope you have buoyed these jokes, I hope to have more for you soon

Thanks for r acing!

Jokes for December 15th

Thursday? Are you sure it’s Thursday? Maybe it’s really Wednesday… Wednesday plus one day.

 Okay, I’m running late with this weeks jokes, but such things happen during the holiday season. Enjoy these jokes even though they are a day late.

 

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What decoration did the investor buy?

Silver bells.

 

What creature likes rain at Christmas time?

A rain-deer.

 

What is a snowmans favorite musical instrument?

Jingle bells.

 

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That’s all the jokes for tonight, I hope you enjoyed them.

Thanks for reading!