A cat’s thoughts, week sixteen 

Tonight I’m lucky enough to have Wild Buffalo Betty here to answer a few questions, I thought I’d ask her about her thoughts of baseball, this should be interesting.

 

Hi Betty, I hope you’re ready to talk baseball!I’d rather talk about gunfighters, but you’re the guy with the catnip.

 

What pitch do you prefer to see?

Hmm, good question, I guess I’d say ‘I’m a calling you out.’

 

Very funny, now do you prefer curveballs or sliders?

Sliders? Ain’t that some kind of fancy hamburger?

  

I see you want to be a comedian tonight, Betty.

Sigh, Wild Buffalo Betty, you should remember that by now and no, I want to be a wrangler.

 

Moving on, do you think vampires enjoy baseball?

Only if there aren’t any steaks around, that’s why us wranglers have nothing to fear from vampires.

 

Do you enjoy strikes or groundball outs best?

I’d rather be sleeping outside, under a starry night sky listening to the Coyotes.

 

Okay… here’s a question you’ll enjoy, do you like the oriels, the cardinals or the blue jays?

Nah, I’ll pass, chicken for me, please, or turkey.

 

Now that would be a name for a baseball team, the turkeys.

With gravy! Always need plenty of gravy! Oh and don’t forget the gravy!

 

Yes, bet… Wild Buffalo Betty, I know you like gravy. Are there any cats who don’t enjoy gravy with their food?

No, that was settled in the shootout at the ok corral, it was between Kitty Brown and Doc Meow… oddly enough there was a bat there as well, I heard they had a ball.

 

Now you’re just making fun of me!

Of course I am! You want to talk baseball while I want to talk about western stuff.

 

Fine! Who would have been the best playing baseball? Doc Holiday or Bartholemew William Barclay Masterson?

Mr Masterson of course! Even I know his nickname, Bat!

 

That’s about all the time we have for tonight, any parting words, Betty?

It’s Wild Buffalo Betty. Never forget my name or I’ll forget you want to sleep. Now give me a bed of catnip like you promised and you may rub my belly.

 

Thanks for joining us tonight. Have a question you’d like for Wild Buffalo Betty to answer? Ask it in the comments and it’ll be answered next week.

A cat’s thoughts, week fourteen 

Tonight I’m joined by… no cat, actually, they both said they had their fill dong an extra post over the weekend, so I’m going to try to make you forget that there isn’t a cat, please bear with me.
I’m here with no cat. How are you tonight?

… cricket… cricket….

 

Hmmm? Oh, cat got your tongue , eh?

…. cricket…cricket…

 

Well you are a cat, or at least you normally would be. So, what are your thoughts about the political situation?

… glare…. cricket… sticks out tongue.

 

I’m sure almost everyone shares that opinion. Do you expect it to get any better soon?

… stares in disbelief….

 

I’m afraid that’s the general consensus. Turning to other matters, if you could have dinner with one person, er, cat I suppose, who would it be?

… cricket… glare….

 

Ah, of course, you wouldn’t want to share your dinner, sensible answer. Baseball season has just started, are you excited?

YES! Yes! Go Rockies! Strike the bums out! Let’s win some games! Hey, who’s on first this year?

 

Oh look, we have a ghost cat that’s fond of baseball and Abbot and Costello.

Are the Dodgers in Brooklyn again? How about the Giants?

  

I’m afraid we’re out of time for tonight, but with any luck, we’ll have this baseball loving ghost cat back in a few weeks. Any parting words?

 Yes! It’s a shame if the home team doesn’t win.

 

Thanks for reading! Feel free to ask any of the cats a question in the comments below.

Play ball!

It’s opening day! Baseball season is upon us!

 It’s a time of hope, of worry, of triumphant wins and horrific loses.

It’s a time for all baseball fans to come together and endure the mocking of other sports, sports that think too highly of themselves.

Whether or not you are a baseball fan, you can look at these teams and see how players from all over the world manage to come together and play a game without caring what the other players look like, believe in or come from.

  

 So watch or listen to a game and realize that things might not be as bad as we fear.

R.I.P Yogi Berra 

The legendary Yogi Berra has died, he was 90 years old. A Hall of Fame baseball catcher, he was also known for the many quotes attributed to him over the years. It is perhaps these quotes, these yogi-isms as they have become known, that he is best known for. In fact I truly believe he may have been one of the best humorists ever, though that is debatable.

Some of the best (in my opinion) are:

“If you come to a fork in the road, take it.”

“A nickle ain’t worth a dime anymore.”

“I always thought that record would stand until it was broken.”

“You give 100 percent in the first half of the game, and if that isn’t enough in the second half you give what’s left.”

“Baseball is 90 percent mental, the other half is is physical.”

“It ain’t the heat, it’s the humility.” 

“I didn’t really say everything I said.”

Fair well, Yogi Berra, we’ll miss you and your  yogi-isms.

You can find many more yogi-isms at the following sites:

http://www.umpirebob.com/DATA/yogiisms.htm

http://www.baseball-almanac.com/quotes/quoberra.shtml

It’s the most wonderful time of the year

No, I haven’t flipped, I know it’s not Christmas time, it’s something much better, it’s baseball season!
Baseball season is here again, it’s a time of great hoped, every team believes that they can win the World Series, every player believing that he can win the MVP (both league and team), every hitter is dreaming of a silver slugger.
Dreams are what baseball is made of, all the dreams are good ones… Until some go down hill and become nightmares.
Still, it’s the start of a new season, no matter if your team wins or loses the opening day game, they can still get into the playoffs, there are still 161 games remaining.
Yes, baseball season is starting, for the time it’s the most wonderful time of the year, next week is soon enough for reality to set in.

Go Rockies! We’re going to the World Series this year!

Thanks for reading!

Jokes for February 26th

I’ve got a few jokes for you tonight, there’s puns, cowboys and baseball(not all in the same joke) so let’s get to them!

Long ago there was a cowboy called Slim, in addition to riding herd, he worked at maintaining the telegraph line as an electrician . Eventually Slim retired and went east to visit his cousin in New York.
Slim was warmly received until his cousin asked him why he left the west and Slim replied ” I’m delightfully deranged.”

Why was the baseball team of vampires the best in the league? Because they suck the life out of other team!

How did the bee get the starting pitching job? He raised quite a buzz in spring training.

Why do cowboys make good dog catchers? They got a way with those doggies.

Thanks for reading, I hope you got a few chuckles out of these jokes.

Random thoughts for February 3

With the Super Bowl over, we are now free to turn our attention to more important matters… Matters that cause us to lose our minds and start believing in happy endings.
The days until this event are growing short, soon enough the greatest day of the year will be upon us, a day that is as set in stone as any holiday, a day that the whole country is waiting eagerly for.
I am of course talking about baseballs Opening Day, less than 47 days away now!

Thanks for reading!